one doesn't simply move on...

                     

-Stop judging me 

Those who know me, know I am the poster child for Love. I live it, breathe it, I am a fairy tale love enthusiast. Which by the way is frowned on by a lot of people who live in "reality', but I am in fact perfectly fine with being love drunk.. even if it is just off of the thought of love alone. Anywho, I am back with a part two to my sad, yet very entertaining sexcapade I posted a while back. As you can see by the title, I have moved on... but I didn't do it in the traditional way. 

Unfortunately (for y'all , cause I know you wanted some tea) I did not find a rebound and blow his mind then leave him somewhere questioning his manhood. I also did not have a Barbara, this is Shirley moment either (although, it crossed my mind more times than I can count.) Wanna know What Chanel Shion did? I had sex. One last time. This time I didn't enter the lair of lies with a heart full of hope and lust. This time I had no weight on my shoulders..just a vagina who was ready to get it over with. I knew I shouldn't have went but I mean, how else do we learn lessons if we don't make the decisions that go against our better judgement. Nothing like a good ol' mistake huh? 

Okay, so I come over late, per usual, and the whole vibe was off. Im pretty sure I heard my uterus whisper, bitch why are you here, but of course I'm halfway up the stairs and what the hell am I suppose to do, turn around and leave? No. Mama didn't raise no puta. An emotional slow bus maybe, but not a puta. So I'm there and immediately we get straight to it and now that I think about it I don't even think we spoke to each other that night. Weirdos I know...(don't judge us, or me,,I know how y'all millennials think) 

So it starts off with us pretending to get along for 30 seconds before we begin. And for the first time in our sex history I took the iniative to be in full control. I rode him like he was the midnight train to Georgia and we all know that's the last train until about 5 am and I had to be at work at 9. Now, really quick, stop judging me. I Know you're reading this trying to decipher my sex game..you can't..so stop. Ok so I won't say too much but lets just say that night the sexcapade ended within a good 5-6 minutes. No fucking lie. Now I know y'all are probably laughing but you can't because sometimes it gets like that. Don't t judge him because he had a long day and he didn't stand a chance against the wonder walls  (lmao that was funny..give me my props) 

So truth be told I didn't realize what I had done and how I had the upper hand until later because I was so mad that night. This fool slept the entire night....literally. He was so knocked I woke up a few times out of my natural sleep and looked over at him like no the fuck he ain't still sleep! He was. Anyway flash forward to about some weeks ago. Im a natural wonderer. I need answers for just about everything because Im a Capricorn and you know, we like to know shit. So of course we've had a convo or 6 about why, and how come, and any other questions I had already had the answers to. Now I won't place any blame on him because he has shown his true colors plenty of times but I was so in denial I tried painting a different picture with everything he displayed. That's that imagination of mine. Not his fault....I mean he's not innocent but you know I have to own up to my mistakes too..

So I officially decided to leave him alone after I almost considered  opening up the cookie factory one..last.. time. ( I know y'all, I know ..but when you don't have a bunch of men on stand by you stick with the comfortable penis you're used too..stop judging me). But praise the Lord , I remembered my worth and declined the offer of a good orgasm ( because he was going to try redeem himself..for sure) and opted for self respect and self love instead. See ladies and gents..i'm not that much of a slow bus. I finished strong this time. I didn't walk away with sadness and heartbreak. But with a few tears  of this is actually over and a haha I put you to bed under my belt. 

 le' sigh. Til' next time my loves. Thank you for showing interest in my life.